Saturday, July 23, 2016

MeiMei Birth Story

My second delivery was smooth and rather quick. Surprisingly I did not opt for epidural unlike my first. This time around I experienced natural contraction while I thought it was just a normal menses cramp. I could actually tahan the initial plain level because I used to have very bad menstural cramp which to the extend that I feel like dying if I don consume pandenol for help.

So I was at my 40 weeks already and at 0430am, I started feeling crampy. Rolled around the bed till 0630am to wake A up for work. I was convincing myself that it could just be normal cramp as I was already having very backache and pevic pain since week 20plus. Lay around the house and time my "contractions", reality still hasnt kick in.

Took the last baby bum before I pop.


Had my last coconut drink. Before I finally decided to head to my gynae for a check.


1130am - So I tolerated with the pain (but still bearable) and went down for a CG scan. Readings not accurate, seems like a false alarm. Then Dr checked. 4-5cm dilated!

Gynae told me to admit myself to the delivery ward now. Told Mil that I want to have my last normal meal before entering. Otherwise I have no energy to push later.

1200pm - Arrived at Mount A canteen. Had my lunch, while the contractions is getting stronger and the urge to poo. Finished our lunch and we walked up to the labour ward. Changed and lay on the bed. By then it was 1.20pm. Waited till 2pm, A reached and tried talking to me but I will concentrating on my breathing. It felt so long a wait to reach my 10cm.



Contractions is getting stronger and I just wouldnt want to waste my energy speaking. Breathing in the laughing gas, which I think it really did help distract some of the pain.

230pm - Gyane arrived. Still 4-5cm and broke my waterbag

300pm - I requested to be checked. Disappointed cause I was not yet ready. The nurse scolded me not to call them unless I really have the urge to poo. Then its about time. LOL!

340pm - Tada. Checked and Im ready! I only knew that I wasnt screaming nor shouting or moaning. The only thing I did was grabbing the handle bar so tide each time the peak of contractions. Then from the background I heard my gyane's voice and I knew it was going to be over soon because Im ready.

350pm - Meimei was out!!!

I am surprised that I really did it without epidural but with laughing gas. Very fortunate that I do not need to go through episiotomy.

MM is turning 5 months in a few days time. Really love her and korkor so much.

I wish all mummies and MTB, all the best and lets work hard for our lovely kids!

Loves.

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Back to E-diary

Dear E, 

Today I had a meaningful talk with my colleague. They could understand my struggle which I am facing and have been facing for the past two years at work. I believe in myself and I know how to get things done. Always performing my best and providing the best solution to all my (indirect or direct) working partners in anyway possible. Definitely in the most professional and ethical methods.

This is my first job and I acknowledged the fact that there are a lot more things I have to learn through years of experience and practice which will benefit me wherever I go in the future.

On the practical point, I need my job. I would not do anything silly just to jeopardize my living hood. Unless I am born with a silver spoon or come from a not that bad family background that I can always turn and fall back on. Unfortunately, I don. Thus I need my job badly so to support my families plus with our new flat coming.

Sadly, three years into workforce. I see the ugly in human. Lucky thing is only ONE. Yet this particular one created a hell for me to handle and I had reached my limit for now.

I shall not complaint about this human. So lets wait for Karma to reach this human.

In short, I tried my best to perform my duties. However, please do respect me as a lady human. I am not your punching bag nor are you purpose to instigate my relationship with others. Its bad for you to do so. 

There is a saying "If you want others me to respect you, you got to earn the respect first."

Now my stand is the respect was lost. So don ever expect me to respect you.

Your Sincerely,
WN


Thursday, July 14, 2016

Work Life Balance?

I have never shared anything about my current job which I am now into my third year at it already. I really enjoyed my duties but I do need to strike a well balance of work and life. Im human too and a mum of 2. I missed out a lot a lot on my #1 growing up and I do not want to miss out for my #2. 

I never felt so worn out and mentally depressed till now. A full time working mum and exclusive breastfeeding mum is not easy. Bosses and colleagues are very understand. Unfortunately, this unnecessary stress are created by others.

Even there are matters to handle, after working hours I will try my best to complete it. If things are restricted and limited, no matter how urgent it is I still couldnt get it done over the night. Even if I managed to complete it, what can the other party do over the night. They cant either.

My nights are now for my family.

I am a family women.

Family comes before my career. Of course, I do need my job to support my family.

Really really wish he they could understand my situation and not pester me onto matters that are not urgent and yet making it sounds very very urgent. #lovehaterelationship